apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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