phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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