just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
my poor anus
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
