we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
