ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
So gin and wine won't be happening again
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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