You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Boobs speak an international language.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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