I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
