TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
