we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize