I'm eating all of the evidence.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
