i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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