Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
