Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
We need to get me chipped asap
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
