one two three fourrrrnication!
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
