She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Randomize
