It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
