i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
