a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
