i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
