Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
