you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
