saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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