I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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