I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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