DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize