Plan B is the new Plan A
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
