So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize