I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
