Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
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