I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
