dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I will pee on everything he values.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
