we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
