I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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