Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
