great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
