ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
