Cold hands, warm shart.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
