You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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