Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
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