Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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