Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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