i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
You know, be my cock's hype man.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
