I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
