I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
