so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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