Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
What a dumb baby whore.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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