Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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