I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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