Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
