If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
