i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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