i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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