Church boner. Awkwardddd
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
The uberlube is also flammable
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
